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New Innovative Masterses launched

King's is truly king of the heap when it comes to new innovative interdisciplinary cross-subjectual postgraduate education in Ireland going forward. This Autumn sees the start of our groundbreaking MA in Anglo-Irish Studies. Other universities confine themselves to a narrow literary or social definition of what constitutes Anglo-Irishness, but KCD leads the field in bringing it all together under the spreadsheet of Integrated Cultural and Political Studies (ICAPS). Our new MA features key modules on:

      • Anglo-Irish Writing
      • Anglo-Irish Meats
      • Anglo-Irish Banking
      • Anglo-Irish Foxhunting

If you want the full story, if you want the flexibility and intellectual firepower to stand out from the crowd when you go a-huntin' for that all-important first job, you need to buy into the KCD vision of ICAPS, encapsulated in our breakthrough concept of Anglo-Irish Studies as you've never seen them before.

Interdisciplinary Master's in Misery Studies

How are you adjusting to the depression, the recession, the downturn, the crash, the slump, or whatever they're calling it now? Are you just lying down under it in an unstructured fashion, going with the punches and rolling with the flow? Or are you determined to make sense of it all? Embrace your inner stoic? Rally, re-group and fight back? Downsize your lifestyle without losing sight of your dreams? To defeat depression, first you have to internalize it. And where better to start than in the green heart of Ireland?

  • The Irish Famine ("An t-Ocras Mór" as we call it in our ancestral Gaelic)
  • 800 Years of Oppression, but what would you expect from the Anglo-Normans?
  • Caoineadh na dtrí Mhuire
  • Bold Robert Emmet, He Died With A Smile
  • From Godot to Endgame
  • The Fields of Thierry Henry
  • Abused by Our Beloved Clergy

The Course Director is Father Phil Aruno, late of Vatican City. All of the above modules are compuls ory. In addition, students will be required to write a thesis detailing parental faults and misapprehensions in the matter of their own upbringing. The duration of the course is one year, unless the slump lasts even longer than expected. Downsized executives are particularly welcome to apply. Application is by letter; please feel free to write at length.

Realizing Real Estate Value

The King's Campus in Phoenix Park is ripe for tasteful redevelopment. But it has to be done with sensitivity and style. That's why we hired Faraonico, the leading Italian architectural practice, who have prepared exciting plans for the new King's Dublin Western Portal. Just click on the BEFORE and AFTER pages to see what we're planning for the presently underutilized Phoenix Park peri-urban facility.

Special Offer : The Sport of King's

Summertime in Dublin. When the students have been cleared out and their living quarters fully fumigated, why not take advantage of our stunning facilities in the luscious greenery of the Phoenix Parkland? We've got some of Dublin's finest real estate. Stay in King's Mansion Luxury Parkside Apartments for only $499 per week per person sharing in six-bedded bedsits with fully-equipped avocado-themed bathroom and Finninsh sauna on each and every floor. Marvel at the magnificent herds of Scandinavian-type deer roaming across the nearby parkland, suitable for light shooting with .33 rifles (subject to planning permission). Refreshing swimming facilities in the nearby Liffey. For the young at heart, try roaming in the Park - you never know who you'd meet. Witness the ritual dances of Celtic Druids on the night of the full moon. Join an impromptu cider-tasting soirée near the Wellington Monument. Hop on the Luas tram from the proposed UNDERGROUND METRO INTERCHANGE into central Dublin for some retail therapy, then relax with an invigorating bout of Old-Style Waltzing in our Collegiate Basketball Arena. For details of these fabulous offers, contact King's Conference Associates at KCD. Terms and conditions apply.

Decentralization : The Way to Go

Why should the benefits of a King's education be confined to Dublinsiders? Fuelled by generous funding from Finer Small Campuses, discreetly subsidized by the Irish Governmment, we are spreadings our wings around the provinces. Following our successful expansion into Royal Meath, we are already planning our next bridgehead in County Mayo, together with our new outlet partner The University of Foxford. The King's West Education Mall launches next Autumn with accredited degree courses in Community Leadership, Charismatics and Consultancy. In future years, the range of King's degrees in Mayo will expand to include Marine Malacology and Mediatic Interview Techniques. Leader of the Mall will be Dr P.J. O'Toole, younger brother of KCD President Magnus O'Toole. P.J. is the author of seminal educational texts including Not in My Barbecue and I'm Glad You Asked Me That. Other selected staff at the Dublin campus will be offered transfers to Mayo, depending on their research earnings in the coming year.

President Slams Complacency

In a hard-hitting speech to the King's College Parents' Association, President Magnus O'Toole lashed out at educationalists who waste time maintaining the status quo and teaching traditional academic subjects. Speaking at an Awayday held at Wicklow's exclusive Kippure Hotel and Artificial Ski Resort, O'Toole stressed the need for constant change and nonstop exciting innovation. He characterized his adversaries in Ireland's academic community as Moaning Minnies of the Rearguard. "Come off it, fellas," he urged. "We live in the midst of a sea change. Are we going to bury our heads in the sand?" Support for President O'Toole's courageous stance was voiced last night by other leading academic leaders. Dr Allister McGurk, former President of the Timahoe Institute of Phlogiston Studies, spoke in praise of "a judicious and cogently argued position, stated with O'Toole's trademark eloquence."

"Profiting from education" - that's the KCD difference

Optically challenged? We can recommend a very reasonable optician.

Quote of the Month: "Money is the One True Measure of Research"
(Magnus O'Toole)

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